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Subsection 23B(1) of the Marriage Act sets out the grounds on which a marriage may be invalid.

They are:

1/           either of the parties is, at the time of the marriage, lawfully married to some other person

o       A marriage is void where either of the parties is, at the time of the marriage, lawfully married to another person (paragraph 23B(1)(a) of the Marriage Act).

2/           the parties are within a prohibited relationship

o A marriage is void where the parties are within a prohibited relationship (paragraph 23B(1)(b) of the Marriage Act).

o Prohibited relationships are marriages:

• between a person and an ancestor or descendant
• an ancestor is someone from whom a person is descended (parent or grandparent)
• a descendant is someone descended from the person (child/grandchild), or
• between a person and their brother or sister (whether whole or half-blood).

3/           by reason of section 48 of the Marriage Act the marriage is not valid

O      Under section 48 of the Marriage Act a marriage solemnised otherwise than in accordance with sections 40-47 is not a valid marriage. A marriage may be invalid where:

o       the vows do not comply with section 45 of the Marriage Act, or

o       there is doubt that the marriage ceremony took place.

4/           the consent of either of the parties is not a real consent because it was obtained by duress or fraud, a party was mistaken as to the identity of the other party or as to the nature of the ceremony performed or that party is mentally incapable of understanding the nature and effect of the marriage ceremony,

o       Under section 23B of the Marriage Act a person’s consent to a marriage is not real if:

• the consent is obtained by duress or fraud
• one of the parties is mistaken as to:
  • the identity of the other party, or
  • the nature of the ceremony performed, or
• a party is mentally incapable of understanding the nature and effect of the marriage ceremony.
• A determination of whether any of these grounds have rendered a marriage void is a matter for the Family Court.

5/            Either of the parties is not of marriageable age.

o       The marriageable age in Australia is 18 years for both males and females. (Section 11 of the Marriage Act) A person under the age of 16 cannot marry under any circumstances. Two people under the age of 18 cannot marry under any circumstances.

O      It is an offence for a person to solemnise, or purport to solemnise, a marriage if the person has reason to believe that one or both of the parties are not of marriageable age. The authorised celebrant must therefore carefully check the age of both parties from their birth certificates or extracts. It is also an offence for a person to go through a form of ceremony of marriage with a person who is not of marriageable age. (Section 95 of the Marriage Act)

O      For further information on offences, please refer to Part 11 of the Guidelines.

o       Where one of the parties to a marriage is not of marriageable age, the marriage is void unless the required orders and consents have been obtained

**

When an authorised celebrant is approached by a couple to solemnise a marriage, the authorised celebrant must satisfy themselves that the marriage is not invalid by reason of any of the above grounds.

Each ground is further explored in detail in pages 92-103 of the Guidelines on the Marriage Act 1961 for Marriage Celebrants – July 2014

The main reference sources for information relating to questions on legal aspects of marriage are listed on my webpage:

• The Marriage Act 1961
• Guidelines On The Marriage Act 1961 For Marriage Celebrants
• Code of practice for Marriage Celebrants 
• Marriage Regulations 1963  (up until 31/3/2018) and
• Marriage Regulations 2017 (from 1/4/2018); 
• Marriage Act 1961 and Marriage Regulations 2017
• Newsletters issued by the Attorney General’s Department
• Fact sheets issued by the Attorney General’s Department
• Guidelines on conflict of interest and benefit to business for Commonwealth-registered marriage celebrants – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 189 KB]
• Guidelines on advertising for Commonwealth-registered marriage celebrants  – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 85KB]
• Maintaining your registration as a Commonwealth marriage celebrant – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 100KB]
• About the Marriage Celebrants Programme – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 98KB]
• Celebrants obligations when solemnising marriages – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 96KB]
• Complaints against a Commonwealth registered marriage celebrant – Updated April 2018 [DOCX 87KB]

Copies of legislation and regulations can be viewed online or downloaded from ComLaw.

This very question is covered in section 8.1  of the Guidelines for Marriage Celebrants.

A valid marriage changes the legal status of the parties to the marriage.

This has potentially far-reaching implications for the parties which include:

• official identity documentation –
  • a married person can obtain official identity documentation, such as an Australian passport, in their married name (subject to the Australian Passport Office rules)

• financial arrangements –
  • provisions in the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth) regulate how the married couple’s financial arrangements will be determined should they separate

• inheritance of property –
  • marriage invalidates any will made by either party to the marriage prior to the marriage (unless the will is made in contemplation of the particular marriage).
  • Also, dissolution of marriage may revoke, or otherwise affect the operation of, the will of a party.

An authorised celebrant must be satisfied that a proposed marriage will be valid at all times prior to the conclusion of the marriage ceremony.

WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES FOR THE AUTHORISED CELEBRANT AND THE COUPLE IF THE MARRIAGE IS NOT VALID OR IF THE AUTHORISED CELEBRANT BELIEVES IT MAY NOT BE VALID?

The authorised celebrant may have committed an offence.

• Under section 100 of the Marriage Act it is an offence for a person to solemnise a marriage or purport to solemnise a marriage if he or she has reason to believe there is a legal impediment to the marriage or it would be void. (For further details on the offence in the Marriage Act please refer to Part 11 of the Guidelines. )
• The Registrar of Marriage Celebrants may also take disciplinary measures against a Commonwealth-registered marriage celebrant. (See Section 39 of the Marriage Act)
• One of the negative consequences for the couple may be that they have to apply to the Family Court for a declaration as to the validity of their marriage.
• They may also have to go through a second marriage ceremony under section 113 of the Marriage Act 1961 (Cth) (see Part 10 of the Guidelines).
• A valid marriage usually invalidates any existing will.
• The position of each member of the couple and members of their families may be considerably affected if a marriage is not valid.

Each of these processes can be stressful, expensive and difficult for the couple (not to mention the Celebrant).

Many non-Christians mistakenly think that Christmas, is of the greatest importance to Christians as it is the celebration of the birth of Jesus, but it is actually Easter when people gather across the world in prayer to mourn the torture & death of Christ and to also Celebrate his Resurrection, their faith, forgiveness, reconciliation, and the miracle of life itself.

May all Christians have a happy & Holy Celebration.

and to all, Happy Easter

You need to provide documentary evidence obtainable from the court where you were divorced.

In Australia, the proof of divorce process allows you to request a search of the records of the Family Court of Australia and the Federal Circuit Court of Australia. Where a divorce can be proven, you will be provided with an official document that serves as proof that a divorce was granted and finalised.

Apply online

The process of requesting proof of divorce records is different depending on where and when your divorce was granted.

In NSW, you can apply on live at https://eservices.comcourts.gov/au/

For more information select the relevant option below:

These weblinks provide information for various states and courts:

• http://www.federalcircuitcourt.gov.au/wps/wcm/connect/fccweb/how-do-i/divorce/proof-of-divorce/fcc-proof-divorce
• My divorce was granted in Western Australia
• My divorce was granted outside of Australia
• My divorce was granted before 1976
• My divorce was granted after 13 February 2010
• My divorce was granted before 13 February 2010
• I need a copy of a divorce, but I wasn’t one of the parties involved in the divorce proceedings
• I need confirmation that I was not divorced at a certain date

I will mention the legal requirements later in the answer, but will firstly say that as I submit registrations online, the registration of marriage at the NSW BDM, usually takes place on the next business day. If the wedding takes place in the morning on a business day, there is the slim possibility of same day registration.

The Certificate of Registration, or Standard Marriage Certificate’ is available immediately following that registration.

There are currently only two exception:

1. ‘same sex marriages (SSM)’, as these marriages are presently registered via paper submission only, so it can take a little longer. NSW BDM is working on the I.T. issue and will hopefully have it resolved soon sometime soon. If the certificate is urgent, let me know as I may be able to hand deliver to the NSW BDM head office at Chippendale, to expedite.
2. Interstate marriages. The marriage must be registered in the state in which the ceremony occurs, and manual paper registration may be required.

If I, as your Celebrant, order the NSW Certificate for you, I find that it usually gets delivered to me within 2-5 working days by Registered Post but that is of course subject to NSW BDM processing time and Australia Post, delivery periods (had one take about 7 days).

You can of course apply for the certificate yourself, directly to the NSW-BDM and you will note that NSW BDM does apply a fee to issue the certificate so if you want me to get it for you, that same fee will apply, as well as of course a small handling fee of $19 but I will then, usually, hand deliver it to you.

If it is urgently required, I can arrange to pick it up from Parramatta but an additional handling fee may apply – just ask me.

Now, back to the first part of the question about how soon will the marriage be registered?

The Marriage Act, and its Guidelines for Celebrants are quite clear that the documents arising from the Wedding Ceremony must be submitted for registration within 14 days of the marriage. Here is an extract from the Guidelines:

7 REGISTERING THE MARRIAGE

Subsection 50(4) of Marriage Act 1961 (Cth) requires the authorised celebrant to forward the Form 16 official certificate of marriage and the NOIM (together with supporting documents) to the BDM in the State or Territory in which the marriage was solemnised within 14 days of the marriage being solemnised. Some states and territories allow these documents to be lodged online. Authorised celebrants should make enquiries with the relevant BDM about the availability of this option. Contact details for the BDMs can be found in Part 13 of these Guidelines.

Other necessary supporting documents that should also be sent to the relevant BDMs with the Form 16 certificate of marriage will depend on the circumstances of the marriage. Such documents may include any official translations of documents, copies of parental consents or court orders for an underage marriage, statutory declarations or the certificate of faithful performance by the interpreter (formerly called the Form 24). Note that BDMs have different practices as to what supporting documents are required. For example, WA BDM will usually receive any parental consents or court orders for an underage marriage, Certificates of Interpreter or statutory declarations but not other documents.

Marriages are then registered in the State or Territory in which they are solemnised, in accordance with the law of that State or Territory. Copies of, and extracts from, entries in the register of marriages can be obtained from the registering authority in the State or Territory in which the marriage is registered. Note that WA BDM does not issue extracts from the register of marriages.

It is the responsibility of the authorised celebrant, not the parties to the marriage, to forward the documents to the BDM to register the marriage. Under no circumstances should the documents be given to any other person, including either or both of the parties to the marriage, to carry out this obligation. The obligation belongs to the authorised celebrant only.

Serious consequences may arise for the authorised celebrant and the couple if the authorised celebrant does not forward the documents to the BDM to register the marriage within the required time. Disciplinary measures, in the form of a caution, being required to undertake professional development, suspension or deregistration, could be taken against a Commonwealth-registered marriage celebrant who does not comply with their obligation to register a marriage. A minister of religion of a recognised denomination could be removed from the register of ministers of religion for failing to comply with this obligation. (ref:Section 33 of the Marriage Act)

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You will need to call me to find out. My diary can fill quickly but there are always gaps.

I work full time as a Celebrant and so am available up to 7 days per week for ceremonies, excluding Christmas Day and Easter Friday/Sunday.

(Extra fees do of course apply for Public Holidays.)

A marriage occurring in Australia may be solemnised on any day, at any time, and at any place. The marriage must be registered in the State or Territory where the marriage was solemnised.

To meet this requirement, and possible requirements of other countries for recognition of the marriage, marriages in aircraft and ships at sea should be avoided but of course, wedding on docked ships are common.

Your driver’s licence can be used as your proof of identity but not proof of your date and place of birth.

The following documents only are acceptable as evidence of a party’s date and place of birth:

• an official (original) certificate of birth, or an official extract of an entry in an official register showing the date and place of birth of the party, or
• a statutory declaration from the party or the party’s parent stating:
  • it is impracticable (this does not mean not practical or convenient; it means impossible) to obtain an official birth certificate or extract, and the reasons why, and
  • to the best of the declarant’s knowledge and belief and as accurately as the declarant has been able to ascertain, when and where the party was born, or
• a passport issued by the Australian government or a government of an overseas country showing the date and place of birth of the party.

I would suggest you contact the Embassy of Ukraine in Australia, as there may now be records available.

Embassy of Ukraine in Australia
Chief: Kulinich Mykola
Ambassador of Ukraine to Australia
Level 12:1/60 Marcus Clarke Street, Canberra ACT 2601
GPO Box 1567, Canberra, ACT, 2601.
http://australia.mfa.gov.ua/en
Phone: +61 2 6230 5789
Fax: +61 2 6230 7298
Email: emb_au@mfa.gov.ua

There is also an application form available for download from the Embassy website for persons seeking certificates.

If you are unable to obtain a birth certificate, you will need to include the evidence of your efforts in preparing a Statutory Declaration to attest to your identity and why you are unable to obtain record of your date and place of birth. You will also need to submit a Statutory Declaration from a parent.

Here is an extract from the Guidelines for Marriage Celebrants referring to Statutory Declarations in these circumstances.:

4.4.3 A STATUTORY DECLARATION

If a party does not have a birth certificate (for example, if a party was born in a refugee camp and did not receive a birth certificate) or passport, the party, or a parent of the party, may make and give to the authorised celebrant a statutory declaration setting out the reasons why it is ‘impracticable’ (impossible) to obtain such a certificate or extract. The declaration must also state, to the best of the declarant’s knowledge and belief, and as accurately as the declarant has been able to ascertain, when and where the party was born (see Part 12.5 of the Guidelines for further information on statutory declarations).

Other than in very exceptional circumstances, an authorised celebrant should not accept a statutory declaration from a person born in Australia, as it is almost always possible to obtain a birth certificate or extract from the State or Territory of birth. However, in the very rare situation that a party born in Australia does not have a birth certificate or extract (or a passport) and it is impracticable to obtain one, they may provide a statutory declaration instead. For example, a party who was born in a remote community whose birth was never registered with authorities may not be able to obtain an official birth certificate. It would be appropriate to allow such a person to make a statutory declaration as proof of their date and place of birth.

That is dependent entirely on your budget, style,  the ambient mood you want, your tastes (personal preferences) and any venue conditions e.g. if in a national park, amplified music may not be permitted.

So basically it is your choice.

A string quartet, single instrument, or vocalist, bagpipes or live bands can be fantastic, but may be dependent on budget.

A good DJ can add a lot of fun and if you provide some guidance, will play the music of your choice, however the Celebrant, DJ and/or musicians can also offer you some valuable guidance as well.

Consider as well, how much music, dancing & singing there will be during or after the ceremony or at the reception.

You could have live music such as a string quartet just for the Ceremony and a DJ or live band for the fun reception.

You will find more detailed information and ideas at these links:

• LINKS – Helpful People
• Wedding Songs
• Weddings Ideas
• Wedding Poems & Readings
• Music for Funerals & Memorials
• Venues

#weddingmusic; #weddingsongs; #marriageceremony

We are each impacted by grief at some point in our lives.

Forgive yourself for your feeling and other for their fear.

Your feelings and their fears are both real and important.

Talk to your friends and relatives. They may be frightened to open up to you and to have you open to them because they are frightened they will upset you and/or upset themselves but death is a part of life and something we must all come to terms with.

Grief has a process and if you ignore it, it will exacerbate. It was Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, who first identified and clarified the 7 Stages of Grief in her book “On Death and Dying” which may help you understand the wretched stranger called grief that inflicts us at a time of great loss; and the passage that we all go through to survive.

You can also ask for help from your own GP, the local Community Health Centres, Hospitals, Churches & Ministers of Religion, and a variety of Welfare Agencies.

You will find more information and a list of service providers, on my webpage (see the link below)

Grief & Loss

Firstly, if you have been married more than once, you only need evidence of the end of the most recent marriage to prove eligibility for a new marriage, which is quite separate to providing a paper trail for name changes and proving identity.

To answer this question, I refer directly from the Guidelines for Marriage Celebrants: 4.5.1 Evidence Of Death Of Former Spouse

Evidence

In the case of a party whose last marriage ended with the death of their spouse, couples must be advised the marriage cannot take place until evidence of the death has been provided.

The evidence of the termination of that marriage will be the spouse’s original death certificate.

Died In Australia

If the party wishing to marry does not have the death certificate, and their spouse died in Australia, the party should be able to obtain the death certificate from the Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages (BDM) in the State or Territory where their spouse died.

Spouse Died Overseas

If a party’s former spouse died overseas, the authorised celebrant should still sight an original death certificate.

If an original death certificate is not available the authorised celebrant should contact the Attorney General’s Department for guidance.

Death Certificate In Another Language

If the party gives the authorised celebrant a death certificate in a language other than English, they also need to provide a translation of the death certificate by a NAATI accredited translator (see Part 4.10 of these Guidelines).

A translation by the party, a relative or a friend is not sufficient.

Uncertainty of the identity

If an authorised celebrant is not certain of the identity of a deceased person, they should insist on the production of a certificate that shows particulars of the previous marriage to the now deceased person, as well as evidence of the person’s death.

Statutory Declarations

Statutory declarations are not acceptable evidence of the death of a person’s former spouse.

Yes, it is wise and thoughtful to do that so that:

• People will know what they should, wear e.g. dress for a movie theme, smart casual, cocktail attire, or black tie optional.
• You will be reasonably confident that people will dress to the standard you require for the event.

It is always helpful for guests to have an idea of expectations but use clear, common sense language and instructions.

People generally understand ‘cocktail attire’, formal, black tie, smart casual etc. and so having that on the invite gives them a guide as to what they should wear.

If you are having a very casual event, you probably don’t want people turning up in tuxedos but likewise, if you have chosen ‘black tie’, you don’t want guests turning up in torn jeans. So best to offer some guidance on the invite.

**

More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

• Poetry & Readings
• Wedding Questions & Answers (over 200)
• Wedding Songs
• Weddings Ideas
• Funerals – Questions and Answers
• Music for Funerals & Memorials
• LINKS to very Helpful People
• Venues

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The simple answer is no.

Authorised celebrants must not participate in ceremonies because there is no guarantee that the marriage will be valid.

Whilst I must adhere to strict privacy rules, both  you and your fiance’ must sign the NOIM and the No Impediment to Marriage Declarations; and so the information will be in view of each other however even if one party does not notice this on the forms, the failure to disclose can render the new marriage invalid because, like any contract,  informed consent is a prerequisite.

You must also provide proof that the previous marriage was dissolved.

A failure to disclose could place the validity of the new marriage in doubt as indicated in section 23B of the Marriage Act 1961 (Cth), the person’s consent to the marriage may not be a real consent if it is obtained by duress or by fraud.

For further information on the issue of consent please see Part 8.6 of the Guidelines to the Marriage Act for Marriage Celebrants.

The marriage cannot proceed.

It is vital that an authorised celebrant is satisfied that both parties genuinely consent to the marriage. If at any point a celebrant is unsure of the genuine consent of either party, he or she should not proceed with solemnising the marriage.

An authorised celebrant might have been satisfied that a party was mentally capable of understanding the nature and effect of the marriage ceremony before the ceremony was due to be conducted, but might form a different view as a result of the party’s conduct during the marriage ceremony itself. In such a case the authorised celebrant should not proceed to solemnise the marriage until satisfied that the party is mentally capable of understanding the nature and effect of the marriage ceremony.

Other consent issues that arise on the day of the marriage ceremony can include, for example, duress or a party to the marriage who is drunk, intoxicated, under the influence of drugs, or otherwise appears to be in an altered mental state to an extent that this could impair their ability to consent to the marriage.

The same applies to the witnesses. A witness cannot sign if in an altered mental state to an extent that this could impair their ability to comprehend the ceremony.

The anniversary of the loss of a loved one can evoke wonderful memories but can also result in a resurgence of pain & grief.

Processing can be challenging.

Whilst personal time of quiet contemplation. is often desired, isolation might not necessarily be spiritually beneficial and so this time might be better utilised as an opportunity for a family gathering, or a remembrance event so that your shared experience might offer some comfort and unity.

There are some options mentioned on my Helpful People  page  but here are some ideas you might consider:

I will be right beside you, to support you.

I’ll have a copy of the Eulogy or reading (one reason why you need to be sure I have been given a copy of anything to be said or read); and I will be ready to help you read if needed, or to even step in and take over.

These tips will help you continue:

• If you start to choke and find you cannot speak; pause & lift your chin, then take a slow deep breath.
  • when your chin is raised it closes the tear ducts and crying stops (hence the old expression of ‘chin-up’)
  • lifting your chin also opens your air-passage and you can take a deep breathe to regulate and control your breathing which oxygenates your blood stream and brain which serves to improve concentration and control
• don’t worry about your pauses because pauses are a part of communication and everyone will understand or be moved by the moment
• When ready, resume reading or speaking

The bouquet and garter are thrown just before the Bride & Groom make their hasty escape for their honeymoon and so essentially at the end of the night unless of course they plan to stay, in which case it can occur any time after the cake cutting.

More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

• Poetry & Readings
• Wedding Questions & Answers (over 200)
• Wedding Songs
• Weddings Ideas
• Funerals – Questions and Answers
• Music for Funerals & Memorials
• LINKS to very Helpful People
• Venues

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A strapless dress can be very alluring and attractive but you need to be confident wearing it.

Practice your every movement for the Ceremony and afterwards, while wearing a sample dress and have someone else count the number of times you consciously or even unconsciously adjust the garment.

As a Celebrant, I have seen a variety of dresses and all brides look absolutely stunning, but my humble observation is that ‘off the shoulder’ (OTS) strapless dresses will slip up or down and will require frequent, if not constant adjusting even if well fitting and supported by the correct undergarments.

I had one bride let go of her groom’s hands during the vows so that she could adjust her strapless dress.

I am told that fashion models overcome the problem in photoshoots, largely by great design in dresses, very specific undergarments and most significantly, the use of ‘glue’ but even then, they are still restricted in movement.

So that while OTS is fashionable, every time I see a bride or bridesmaid, wearing one, the frequent tugging on the dress can become very distracting (for her & others) and could even impact on your wedding video and photographs.

Imagine turning to your beloved groom to take his hands and suddenly your dress distractingly slides upwards on your arms; and later when you are dancing or go to throw a bouquet, you discover that you have to quickly adjust the dress to avoid embarrassment.

The only way to reduce the movement of the dress, I am told, even if it is a perfect dress with correct undergarment fit, is gluing, pinning to other garments and restricting movement.

In contrast, even a small amount of shoulder support/covering eliminates all the problem and can add eloquence.

More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

• Poetry & Readings
• Wedding Questions & Answers (over 200)
• Wedding Songs
• Weddings Ideas
• Funerals – Questions and Answers
• Music for Funerals & Memorials
• LINKS to very Helpful People
• Venues

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Like Christmas puddings, there was a custom of baking charms (symbolic trinkets) into wedding cakes, but guests need to be warned of this to avoid choking or injury. Probably for both hygiene and safety, this was replaced with a ribbon surrounding the cake so that the charms can readily and easily be removed without risk. There are ten traditional cake charms:

• 1. Anchor, airplane, car or carriage, for travel & adventure
  2. Clover or Horseshoe for good luck
  3. Flower for new love
  4. Heart for true love
  5. Highchair for the arrival of children
  6. Purse for wealth
  7. Ring for the engagement
  8. Rocking Chair for long life
  9. Wedding bells for the marriage
  10. Wishing Well so that all dreams & wishes may come true

You can find suppliers on my Helpful People page.

That is a very personal decision and I’ll explain why.

The ‘Rule of Thumb’ created by a marketing campaign in the 1940s was that two months salary should be spent on the engagement ring and it certainly worked to boost the profits of jewellers but as the ring is more about emotional than income, other consideration should come to play.

The three major considerations should be:

1. Your partner’s expectations
2. Your Budget or ability to meet those expectations
3. Your partners taste in style and jewellery

The goal is to find a balance between the three.

An interesting side consideration is that statistically, those who pay $thousands or even $millions have shorter marriages, so the higher the ring price, the shorter the marriage whereas marriages where under $5000 was spent on the ring, tend to be long lasting.

My summation on that is that where appearances are placed above the relationship, the relationship will get into trouble but if the love and devotion are stronger, the love will be lasting.

So the best outcome is to buy a ring that you can afford but which is  to your tastes.

You kiss whenever you want to.

Traditionally the Kiss occurs just after the vows, since you will technically be married at that point.

However there is still the ‘signing’ (sign Certificates)  and few other bits and pieces to be enjoyed and so I usually suggest that to avoid confusion,  and to enable a smooth flow of ceremony, when there ceremony, the kiss has more meaning at the very end when I introduce you as a married couple for the first time.

But again, it is your ceremony, so kiss whenever you like, though it is wise to remember that all your guests are watching 🙂

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Subsection 45(2) of the Marriage Act sets out the vows required to be said by parties to a civil marriage ceremony (where the authorised celebrant is not a minister of religion).

From 9 December 2017, the vows were changed to reflect the curent definition of marriage:

• I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, A.B. (or C.D.), take thee, C.D. (or A.B.), to be my lawful wedded wife (or husband, or spouse).

This allows marrying couples to make a personal choice about the terms to be used in their marriage vows that best reflect their relationship.

The term ‘husband’ can refer to a male marriage partner, and ‘wife’ to a female marriage partner, regardless of the sex or gender of the person saying the vows.

The term ‘spouse’ can refer to a male, female, intersex, non-binary gender or transgender person.

Subsection 45(2) requires that each party say to the other, in the presence of an authorised celebrant (who is not a minister of religion) and the witnesses, the words:

These words must be included in the ceremony. They are the minimum words which must be exchanged by the couple to ensure that they fully understand the nature of the ceremony and that they are marrying each other.

Balloon or Bubble Releases are a symbol of freedom and aspiration to encourage the couple’s spirit to bloom and grow, but there are legal restrictions on the type and number of balloons as well as environmental concerns.

If however the balloons are released inside a hall or chapel, they can be captured after the event and kept as mementos without environmental harm.

An environmentally safe balloon option is to securely tether the balloons so that they fly upward to form a floating arch, initials or a word, or perhaps a shape (heart)  that will stay for the entire event.

Another environmentally safe balloon option is the use of dancing inflatables.

A great alternative to balloons, is a battery operated bubble blowing machine that release bubbles made from harmless detergents and water and dissipate on impact, leaving nothing behind. Machines are available cheaply from party suppliers and from online stores.

There are many More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

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You can include one or more family members in a variety of ways.

Firstly, keep them involved in the decision  so that it is an inclusive action form the start. Ask what each would like to do as each might already have an idea but be shy about coming forward.

Adult members can be one or two Witness.

Others could be  Usher, Reading, Maid /Man of Honour, take party in a ring warming or even make an epic introduction of at the end of the Ceremony.

Other options are, a keepsake flower presentation to the couple, with the flowers representative of each parent’s personality, so that both bunches of flowers combine in a vase as one beautiful display but add 1 artificial flower of each type to be kept for anniversaries.

You’ll find a few other ideas here:

• Unity – Candle Lighting. 
• Unity – Family Medallion ceremony. 
• Unity – Hand Tree. 
• Unity – Jigsaw.. 
• Unity – Rose petals. 
• Unity – Sand Ritual 
• Unity – Spices. 
• Unity – Stones, flowers & Objects. 
• Unity – Tree or garden planting. 

There are so many variables. I’ll try to narrow down the options.

POPULAR VENUES

If it is a popular, commercial, wedding venue it is not uncommon to book 12-18 months in advance, unless there is a cancellation. Some may even require longer.

At some popular sites, depending on the size of your party, many larger venues can hold more than one function at a time.

PARKS & HALLS

However, if it is a park, beach, community hall or club, you may be able to book in only weeks or perhaps a few months in advance.

BACKYARD

For a back yard weddings, that is entirely up to you.

SEASONS

Spring tends to be the busiest time, followed by Autumn and Summer and finally Winter and so if you want a Winter wedding, you will have more options and flexibility and maybe even a lower price.

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You will find a list of options for Venues on my Venues tab.

That depends entirely upon what you have included in your ceremony and any extra activities you have planned.

The actual Ceremony may run from 20 minutes to an hour, however you might need to book for set-up & preparation time, any extra time needed for  photographs, greetings etc. or even for an on-site the reception etc.

Time should also be allowed for dismantling and removal of the set-up.

The quickest set-up time I have had is about 5 minutes and the longest was about 40 minutes where decorations and equipment had to carried across a field.

Once your Ceremony script has been agreed upon, I can advise you on how long it will run, how much set-up & take-down time is required but you will be in control of other aspects such as the time your vendors (photographer, decorator etc.) require.

Proper legal advice should always be obtained however my understanding is that you may make an application for divorce in Australia if you or your spouse is:

(a)    an Australian Citizen;

(b)    “domiciled*” in; and

(c)     an ordinary resident of Australia and has lived in Australia for the last 12 months.

*“domiciled” means that you or your spouse regard Australia to be your home country.

A marriage certificate issued by an authorised body of an overseas country is evidence of marriage.  An “authorised body” of an overseas country is an organisation that is authorised to perform marriages within that country for example, churches or other religious organisations.  You must provide a copy of your marriage certificate with your application for divorce.  If your marriage certificate is issued in a language other than English, you must provide an English translation of your marriage certificate.

In some (unusual) cases there may be two Courts, for example, the Family Court in Australia and a Family Court in another country that would have a right to determine the issue and annul a marriage.  However, there can be in those circumstances a question as to which of the two countries has the superior right to deal with the divorce.  In certain circumstances there are different consequences in relation to the issues that arise in property, spousal maintenance, child support and child custody depending on which country has the superior right and determines the matters on the breakdown of a marriage.

The Law regarding the solemnisation of marriages is  The Marriage Act 1961, as amended.

Regulations prescribe the practice and procedure including penalties, regarding The Marriage Act 1961  are mentioned 48 times in the Act. The Marriage Regulations 1963  (up until 31/3/2018) and Marriage Regulations 2017 (from 1/4/2018);  can be viewed online or downloaded from ComLaw.

The Guidelines On The Marriage Act 1961 For Marriage Celebrants is a guide for Celebrants as to the interpretation on The Marriage Act 1961.

The Marriage Act 1961 is the national law.

The Regulations prescribe the practice, procedure and penalties.

The production of past Marriage and/or Divorce Certificate goes toward confirming that status but also serves to establish your identity.

Each party to a marriage must give their authorised celebrant documents that establish their date/place of birth and identity. In most cases people use the name recorded on their birth certificate, meaning that name will be recorded on all documents they give their authorised celebrant, and in the NOIM.

If a party gives their authorised celebrant documents recording different names, the authorised celebrant should check the party has provided a sufficient chain of documents that both establish their identity and link the names. The case studies below demonstrate such a chain of documents and how to use them.

Under Paragraph 42(1)(c) of the Marriage Act, each party to an intended marriage must also make a declaration before the authorised celebrant as to their conjugal status and belief that there is no legal impediment to the marriage.

The declaration must be in accordance with the approved form, which is available to all authorised celebrants on the Attorney-General’s Department website.

The declarations must be made before the marriage is solemnised. This should occur as close as possible to the ceremony, even if this requires the parties to make a special attendance by the authorised celebrant.

The Marriage Act does not permit the declarations to be made immediately after the ceremony.

It is an offence for an authorised celebrant to solemnise a marriage unless both parties have made their declarations of no legal impediment.

It is also an offence for a party to knowingly give a false declaration.

The conjugal status a party gives in the declaration should be the same as that given in item five of the NOIM unless the party was waiting for their dissolution of marriage to be finalised at the time of signing the NOIM. In that case the conjugal status on the NOIM will be ‘married’ with some reference to the steps that have been or are being taken to dissolve that marriage, and the conjugal status given in the declaration will be ‘divorced’.

Paragraph 3 of the declaration deals with establishing that the party is of marriageable age and the party should be careful to cross out whichever statement is inapplicable. The authorised celebrant should initial the deletion in the margin. Where a party is a minor, his or her date of birth must be given. The authorised celebrant should at this stage, if this has not already been done, check that a section 12 order has been obtained from a court and check that the consent or consents required under sections 13 or 14 of the Marriage Act are adequate and in order (see Part 8.6 of these Guidelines for further information on marriage involving a minor).

If an authorised celebrant has reason to believe that there is a legal impediment to a marriage, or that a marriage would be void, the celebrant should not solemnise or purport to solemnise the marriage. To do so may be an offence. This is the case even if the marrying couple has signed their declaration, but the celebrant has reason to believe that declaration may be false.

The most common question following a suicide, is ‘why’.

I have tried to answer that question in this poem. If you know of anyone who is troubled, you will find a list of counselling services on my helpful people tab

You ask me why

(copyright: Lou Szymkow, December 2017)

I know you didn’t hear me, I didn’t tell you all,
I knew you couldn’t understand
And besides, I didn’t want to burden you all
So I didn’t tell you everything,
it was my burden to struggle through.
I am not a coward, you know, I just couldn’t find a way to undo,
why I had carry this burden, this inhuman demand.
How could you have helped me, when I myself couldn’t understand?

I tried to fight daily but it just wouldn’t go away.
I knew I couldn’t impose on you and so knew I had to go away.
My life was often wonderful and there were times when I felt blessed.
I had no thought of dying, just of finding rest,
My body was a vessel, my thoughts and brain in disdain,
I just couldn’t live a life, without ending this wretched pain.
It was just too much to bear, this suffocating, darkest air.
but now it is such a relief to see the sun once more
I am free at last, there is sunshine evermore,
So remember me as freedom, in everlasting joy,
I lived and loved, worked and played, I tried to do it all.
So think of only the best of me, and feel the warmth of a better deed,
Keep me in your memories, and let loves gentle thought always be your creed

In the USA the flag is folded 18 times to symbolise the original 18 states of the USA. It is a very precise and specific ritual.

That ritual of course does not apply to Australia but Australian military do have a specific Australian practice.

During military funerals, families may place a flag over the body or casket however, nothing is to be placed over a flag which traditionally must stand alone.

There is a specific instruction for Australian Military personnel on the folding of the Australian National Flag into a square and the packaging of that flag into a presentation case to be given to the official mourner. 

In regard to non-military funerals, according to the Australian National Flag Protocols the National Australian flag can be used to cover the coffin of any Australian at their funeral. The upper left quarter of the flag should be draped over the ‘left shoulder’ of the coffin to represent the heart, and the flag should be removed before the coffin is lowered into the ground, or after the service at a crematorium.

It is a celebration and formal announcement of your intentions and so there are speeches (as many or as few as you like) and like all celebrations, you can have a cake.

It can be as simple as a small gathering or a huge formal affair.

Traditionally the bride’s parents would host the party, the Groom’s parents are the next option,  but commonly this has changed to parents of both the Bride & Groom contributing, or even the couple themselves; so really anyone can host it.

The ‘host’ is the one who organises and finances.

On rare occasions, it is the bridal party (Maid of Honour) who hosts the show, but as the Bridal Party may not yet be confirmed and the Maid of Honour, will be in charge of others gatherings later, it is probably for others to manage the Engagement party.

The Engagement Party would usually be held within 3 months of the actual proposal and some months (at least 6) before the wedding, so the Engagement party should be closer to the proposal than it is to the wedding day.

It is entirely a matter of choice and practicality as to whether you have one but an engagement party announces your love to the world and your intention to marry.

An engagement party is also an opportunity to invite guests that might not attend the wedding.

You can even have your Celebrant attend for a commitment ceremony and ring blessing.

Wear the ring on your right hand or have someone (bridesmaid, mother etc)  hold it for you.

If you want to wear your engagement ring for the reception, you can put it on after the ceremony.

For Jewish weddings keeping with tradition, it’s fine to wear your engagement ring and then exchange stone-free wedding bands .

The wedding band is usually worn closest on the ring finger of your left hand, so that it is closest to your heart.

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More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

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The day after my mother’s funeral, I had to go back to work. I felt alone and sad but had to get on. I rushed out to my car, placed my things on the seat beside me and then looked up as I started the engine.

There on the windscreen was a single and very beautiful, perfect white feather.

Sitting alone in the car, I started to smile & to cry. On her anniversaries, and beside her grave, I have seen the same. A single white, perfect feather.

In an international group on Facebook today, others mentioned similar experiences. Finding a single white, perfect feather.

I wonder how many others have had this same experience?

UPDATE: in the first 10 minutes of this post, I had around a dozen people give me similar stories.

As many or as few as you like.

Just make sure you have two witnesses who are over 18.

Beyond that, it is entirely up to you,  and your venue (and maybe budget) but let me know the numbers so that I can adjust the ceremony accordingly.

If you have only the 2 witnesses in attendance, the ceremony may be under 20 minutes but if you have 200 guests or more, you will want the ceremony to last longer than the time it took to seat everyone, and so you may wish extra readings or rituals to engage everyone in the process or at the very least, make sure everyone can see and hear what is happening.

Most have about the same number at their ceremony as at their reception but some have a large attendance at their Ceremony but a private reception while some have a private ceremony and huge Celebration.

Ask yourself, what you will enjoy most and then check your budget.

There may be little or no difference in the cost of your Celebrant, but the trimming will have a cost.

You have chosen to announce you love for each other to the world, so be confident in how you will do that.

The Australian Government, Department of Human Services, has information available on “What to do following a death” and specific on Assistance

The Australian Government does have payments, counselling and other services to help people adjust after someone close to them has died.

• What happens first
• Insurance policies, funeral plans and Wills
• Notifying us
• Notifying other people and organisations
• Removing someone’s name from mailing lists
• Social media accounts
• Assistance from us
• Financial matters
• Support for you after someone has died
• Other government and community support services

There is a lump sum or short-term payment when your partner, child or the person you were caring for has died.

• When an adult has died
• When a child has died
• Claiming
• Manage your money
• Payment and Service Finder

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More questions answered on my webpage where you will find lots more interesting and useful information including:

• Poetry & Readings
• Wedding Questions & Answers (over 200)
• Wedding Songs
• Weddings Ideas
• Funerals – Questions and Answers
• Music for Funerals & Memorials
• LINKS to very Helpful People
• Venues

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